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Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen.
--Albert Einstein

I'm not choosing between my girlfriend and my best friend. That's insane troll logic.
--Xander from "Buffy the Vampire Slayer"

Did you ever walk in a room and forget why you walked in? I think that's how dogs spend their lives.
--Sue Murphy

Evil will always prevail, because good is dumb.
--from "Spaceballs"

I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn't itch.
--Gilda Radner

I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it.
--Jack Handey, from "Deep Thoughts"

I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world, because they'd never expect it.
--Jack Handy, from "Deep Thoughts"

Consider the daffodil. And while you're doing that, I'll be over here, looking through your stuff.
--Jack Handy, from "Deep Thoughts"

I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
--Mark Twain

If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance.
--George Bernard Shaw

Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.
--Mark Twain

If your parents never had children, chances are you won't either.
--Dick Cavett

All I really need is love, but a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt!
--Lucy Van Pelt in "Peanuts," Charles Shultz

You cannot kill me for I am the shadows and the shadows never die.
--Bakura in Yu-Gi-Oh

Present day mortals are so fun to terrorize.
--Bakura in Yu-Gi-Oh





The Mad House
Graham Family
Goodbye Forever

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